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£28.99
UK Postage Included | Europe €5.99 | Worldwide $7.99
FREE WORLDWIDE OVER €50 / $50
*** Midlife Approved ***
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Safer Than Your Group Chat
Premium Quality
Soft Enough For Mood Swings
Fast Shipping
No Waiting, We Hate That Too
Washing Instructions
HOW TO NOT RUIN THE BEST SHIRT YOU OWN
You've survived hormones, hot flushes, and people asking if you're "okay." You can definitely handle laundry instructions.
Washing:
Cold water only — max 30°C / 90°F. You're already running hot. The shirt doesn't need to join you.
Wash with similar colours. This isn't the time for mixing. You've earned the right to surround yourself with your own kind.
Turn it inside out. Protect that graphic like you protect your last good night's sleep — fiercely and without compromise.
No bleach. Ever. You're fading on your own schedule, thank you very much.
Drying:
Tumble dry on low heat. One of you is already running at 400 degrees. The shirt deserves better.
Remove promptly to avoid wrinkles. On the shirt, obviously. The ones on your face have earned their place and are staying.
Ironing:
Low heat only — steam or dry, your call. Much like a difficult conversation, apply gentle pressure and don't linger too long.
Don't iron directly on the graphic. Turn it inside out or use a pressing cloth. You've ironed out enough in life. Give yourself a break.
The Non-Negotiables:
No dry cleaning. This shirt is low-maintenance. Surround yourself with more things like it.
No fabric softener — the shirt doesn't need it, and frankly neither do you. Perfectly rough around the edges is a vibe.
The tolerance levels have been declining steadily for years. The wine consumption, however, has remained admirably consistent. At this point, it's basically a lifestyle philosophy — and now it's a tee.
Wear it to the school gates. Wear it to the office. Wear it anywhere you need a quiet, cotton-soft reminder that you have your priorities absolutely sorted.
Why You'll Love It
Soft, breathable 100% cotton — as comforting as a large glass of something cold
Classic crew neck with a relaxed, regular fit that works for every body
Bold graphic print that says what everyone in the room is already thinking
Available in Light Blue, Sport Grey, White, Azalea, and Natural — all excellent wine-pairing colours
The Perfect Gift
Know someone whose patience ran out somewhere around 2019 and hasn't been seen since? This is the tee that says "I see you, I get it, and I've already opened a bottle." Pair it with a good Sauvignon Blanc and absolutely no regrets.
