Find your corresponding size on the chart to guide your purchase. Measurements are in inches.
£28.99
UK Postage Included | Europe €5.99 | Worldwide $7.99
FREE WORLDWIDE OVER €50 / $50
*** Midlife Approved ***
Secure Checkout
Safer Than Your Group Chat
Premium Quality
Soft Enough For Mood Swings
Fast Shipping
No Waiting, We Hate That Too
Washing Instructions
HOW TO NOT RUIN THE BEST SHIRT YOU OWN
You've survived hormones, hot flushes, and people asking if you're "okay." You can definitely handle laundry instructions.
Washing:
Cold water only — max 30°C / 90°F. You're already running hot. The shirt doesn't need to join you.
Wash with similar colours. This isn't the time for mixing. You've earned the right to surround yourself with your own kind.
Turn it inside out. Protect that graphic like you protect your last good night's sleep — fiercely and without compromise.
No bleach. Ever. You're fading on your own schedule, thank you very much.
Drying:
Tumble dry on low heat. One of you is already running at 400 degrees. The shirt deserves better.
Remove promptly to avoid wrinkles. On the shirt, obviously. The ones on your face have earned their place and are staying.
Ironing:
Low heat only — steam or dry, your call. Much like a difficult conversation, apply gentle pressure and don't linger too long.
Don't iron directly on the graphic. Turn it inside out or use a pressing cloth. You've ironed out enough in life. Give yourself a break.
The Non-Negotiables:
No dry cleaning. This shirt is low-maintenance. Surround yourself with more things like it.
No fabric softener — the shirt doesn't need it, and frankly neither do you. Perfectly rough around the edges is a vibe.
THE SHIRT THAT TELLS IT LIKE IT IS. IN ORDER OF PRIORITY.
Because not all moods are created equal — and someone needs to rank them. This tee lets you put your name to the chaos, making it officially, undeniably yours. Soft, comfortable, and a completely accurate representation of your inner life.
Why You'll Love It:
Personalised with your name. Because your mood rankings are uniquely, spectacularly your own.
100% ring-spun cotton, 4.5 oz. Lightweight and breathable — for when you're somewhere between "fine" and "do not approach."
Classic fit, crew neck. Versatile enough for every mood on the list.
Tear-away label. No scratchy tags. You've got enough irritants already — they're probably on the list.
Made with ethically grown US cotton. Certified by Oeko-Tex. Good choices, even on bad mood days.
The perfect gift for women 40+. For the one whose mood rankings are legendary.
Designed for women who've stopped pretending the rankings don't exist — and started wearing them with pride.
The Small Print:
100% ring-spun cotton (solid colours)
Personalisation is printed — not embroidered
Please double-check your name spelling at checkout — we print exactly what you give us!
